I'm too Overwhelmed

11:05 a.m. 29 July 2008

So much thought clashing in my mind, I couldn't help myself to concentrate to read my textbook. Why is it always like this? Every time I tried to make good things that fear and doubts would interfere. Thoughts are spinning in my mind right now and is making me crazy. I tried to just ignore and forget them but still, they just keep coming back again. Having a complete focus on my endeavor was always transient. After which, I'll became insane again. Too bad, seems like this was how life had to be for me and I should adapt myself to be used to it. I could not completely wake up to the reality and my waking hours with eyes wide open were just transient as a vapor. My resolution and my inspiration fade away too early before completing any work.

But my persistence is still intact. Regardless of anything, somehow, I was still able to survive these mental tides of life. I still hold on to my sail, persevering to reach the shore of destiny and fulfillment. I am trying so hard not to be led astray but to feel the mark on my shoulder (the mark of the strong).It is in this mark do I found my hope (I'll gonna have a post regarding my mark later).

Perhaps, only blogging aside from physical activity which requires exertion could make my mind stable and sane. My inspiration and willpower was weak. Only doing what I had to do and accomplishing such could I overcome my mind warfare.

So much thoughts to be verbalized supposed to be but my rule is just limited to a minimum of two entries for a particular day.

Could this mind freaking insanity be caused by an imbalance of hormone or just a symptom of an excessive or lack/minimal dose of brain chemicals. Or could this be because of an altered or blocked pathway of neuron to let brain chemicals flow or caused by an introduction of other substance.

But notwithstanding those reasons aforementioned and other more my mind could create afterwards, life is still a never ending battle and it continues to go on and nothing did ever changed, all that is under the sun.