I must do it, I have no choice

I have already lived a quarter of my life and still, it seems as if nothing has changed. The same person I am before, a coward and a daydreamer still. Should I be like this forever? NO. Agreat time for a great leap has come already and its right in front of my doors. I must have to take it or else, the greatest regret of my life would be due to my own cowardice and procrastination having declined the greatest opportunity to undertake. Ever since I was young, I have a dream which I know would be for my own good but how come did I still remain a failure and a humiliation for myself. A question always startling my mind. Am I born a loser? Is fate harsh with me? or just I took no action to achieve such. Yes, God had provided everything for me having gifts and love and support of people around me who sees me as someone else, someone worthy of something. Should I fail them, should I fail myself and become nothing else but seen as a failure and object of pity?

But a choice had to be made by me. YES, I'll gonna make my final choice. To do what I must do. No matter what's the cost and consequences of such. No matter how bad I am in the past and what lies ahead of me. Other peoples' expectations, my dreams and goal and ambitions and the childhood trauma of me and my siblings and the demands of life, i must took it all alone upon myself. I must really had to make this ultimate sacrifice even to the extent of k1ll1ng my sense of self. For the sake of other peoples' expectations on me and ROna's ideal man, I'll do it all for them even making my emotions d3ad and dishonoring myself.

For the goal, for everyone, for everything,
I WILL NOT FAIL. I WILL WIN

MAy God help me and light my way.